Next up on my Lent playlist is a song by Moby. It's a song from Play which was a really successful album and one I enjoyed when I bought it on recommendation from friends shortly after release in 1999. Strangely, I don't feel the same way about it now - I don't really feel much inclination to listen to it at all. However, the one track that I never seem to tire of is 'Why Does My Heart Feel So Bad?' It's musically very moving and the lyrics are very simple:
Why does my heart
Feel so bad?
Why does my soul
Feel so bad?
These open doors
I'm not sure what is intended by that last line but it reminds me of a quote I keep seeing around that is something like: 'blessed are the cracked, for they let in the light.' And so with this song I get a similar idea, like that of 'the dark night of the soul.' Actually a heart and soul that 'feels bad' is one that is an open door. The heart that is secure in itself, confident and forever buoyed up, is not on a journey because it's already arrived. That is perhaps something to get worried about because laziness, complacency and staleness creep in. And so this Lent I'm OK with saying that my heart does feel bad, that my soul does feel bad, but they are open for change, open for life and open for God.
farewell good and faithful servant...
3 hours ago